Most of my life I have heard – you are such a beautiful girl.
You have such a pretty face.
I look in the mirror – where is this girl they are all talking about.
The woman I see looking back at me is insecure.
The woman staring right through me is scared.
She is lonely, terribly lonely.
She feels betrayed.
She feels she is to blame for causing pain.
When I look back into that mirror I see a woman who has had to be silent to survive, though it is so not in her nature.
I see a woman who hates confrontation so much that she has allowed herself to become a victim.
I see a woman who despises herself for allowing her soul to be victimized.
As I stand here in front of this mirror now I look closer.
I look deep into those hazel green eyes.
I am searching for the girl in the woman.
As I look into this woman’s eyes now I see hope.
I look closer – I see strength. In this strength I see desire.
Desire for change. Desire for love. Desire for happiness.
I see the girl that used to live inside this woman. The girl that was told, “If you would only lose a little weight you would be beautiful, because you have such a pretty face”. I see the girl that was told by men she was pretty only to be used and destroyed by them. I see the girl who believed in love and hope and happiness.
I look closely at this beautiful girl and watch as she sheds the burdens she has allowed to gather around her and pull her down. I look closely and finally I see beauty.
I see a beautiful soul.